Friday, August 24, 2007

land's end

circle back on the beginning
where childhood falls through
where the colors name themselves

come to tomorrow's town
where light grazes the ephemeral shore
where emergence stuns the passerby

find life's muse, a painter
who's firm hand melts into
oceans of magnanimous might

try to say something
to save yourself from the edge
where you think time bends

dream harder and sing
reveal your visions through time
as light reaches past the gap

go further
be younger
journey to land's end.


(c) all rights reserved, 2004

Wednesday, August 08, 2007

Check out my Chemo Calendar

a simple thank you in exchange for the outpouring of support i've received in the last few weeks hardly seems adequate. i'm honestly overcome with gratitude. of course, it's this feeling that gives me certainty i'll ultimately make a full recovery from the hodgkin's. even before this, the latest of my many so-called "diagnoses," the secret of my success has always been the generosity of my friends. and in the next chapter of my medical saga, there's no doubt, it will not be otherwise.

since fist receiving the news about my hodgkin's, i've been more preoccupied than normal with questions about how i'll deal with the challenges ahead. i am also aware that i haven't even responded to many of your well wishes and offers of help. i regret that, but please believe that i haven't deliberately just blown you off. i assure you that i have your message and i fully intend to get back to you.

this is, of course, what i'm doing in part right now. there's a bit of an update since i last posted, so i wanted to share it with everyone.

my chemotherapy treatment hasn't begun yet, but i now know that it will begin on friday, august 17th. that's the most recent bulletin.

the reason i haven't begun yet is because i've been undergoing quite a few tests: to get baseline readings for my heart, lungs, blood, etc. i also had a "PET" scan, which shows where the cancer is actually active in the body. there's news on that front, too. it has spread from the lymph nodes in my chest, to those below my diaphragm in my abdomen.

there's a little bit of good news that comes with this: the number of treatments i'll go through will be no different than previously expected. the strength of the dosage will be a little higher, but nobody knows how the side effects will actually manifest, so that's still an open question. in the end, this situation means i'm technically in stage III of IV, a later stage than we first realized. but as far as i'm concerned, the difference is just semantic. my chances of getting through this are pretty much still the same.

okay, one last thing...

many, many, many people have offered to help me with cooking and/or just to be on hand to help me around the house with other basics, like light cleaning and stuff. in some cases, you might be able to pick me up from the hospital and escort me back home to my apartment after my treatments. etc. etc.

well, now you can! and you can also schedule yourself on my new and exciting "shared calendar" thanks to "google calendar." this is a public calendar that anyone who so wishes can view to see what my needs will be and when. plus, you can sign up for specific pre-designated time slots for particular kinds of help.

please check it out. we've tried to make this as easy as possible by creating a user log-in that anyone can use. here's how:

1. go to

2. sign in with the following:

user id: chemocalendar
pass: 4frank

3. view and edit existing entries, or add entries

okay, that's enough from me for tonight. i'll follow up by e-mail again to walk you through the steps, in case this is not as user friendly as i hope it to be. but for now, we have a week to just play with it and get some stuff in order before the 17th.

much love and gratitude,